Garie Beach

SHORT POEM....PLEASE READ.....commets???

"STRANGERS" running in the cold sand our fingers are laced screaming our innocence running in the freedom our breathe well on its own holding hands as we jump the waves gazing at each other until light goes blank going our different ways, we were strangers our life will go on in seperate ways. this poem is about a girl that met a boy in california and they shared a beautiful night at the beach, then went each their own ways.

Public Comments

1. our breath went you spelled breath wrong its good!
2. Awww sad :( Kinda reminds me of Grease
3. it's really good. I love all of the details; it helps to create a picture in my mind of the boy and girl holding hands, jumping into the waves together. I can imagine the orange, red, and yellow sunset. It has really good imagery in it!
4. I think its great,and I found myself in it.But,I think that you should read more and work on your vocabulary.That way,youll have your own style in writing and you will not use phrases that somebody already used.Just go on!You have talent....And maybe you should send it to that boy....I m sure he will like it... ;)
5. I loved the fact that you explained it and im really feeling the use of imagery that you use it's refreshing and very realistic as far as what summer or young love is about.
6. I really liked it, write more please!